Because I have friends who say they love me. One sent me and article. With a note saying “because you love raging against the machine, enjoy.” Ah friends.
Andy Rooney didn’t really do this piece, so I also include the original source. And I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t put my two cents in the game.
As I grow in age, I value women over 40 most of all. Here are just a few reasons why: A woman over 40 will never wake you in the middle of the night and ask, ‘What are you thinking?’ She doesn’t care what you think.
If a woman over 40 doesn’t want to watch the game, she doesn’t sit around whining about it. She does something she wants to do, and it’s usually more interesting.
Women over 40 are dignified. They seldom have a screaming match with you at the concert or in the middle of an expensive restaurant. Of course, if you deserve it, they won’t hesitate to shoot you if they think they can get away with it.
Older women are generous with praise, often undeserved. They know what it’s like to be unappreciated.
Women get psychic as they age. You never have to confess your sins to a woman over 40.
A woman over 40 looks good wearing bright red lipstick, this is not true of younger women or drag queens.
Once you get past a wrinkle or two, a woman over 40 is far sexier than her younger counterpart.
Older women are forthright and honest. They’ll tell you right off if you are a jerk or if you are acting like one.
You don’t ever have to wonder where you stand with her.
Yes, we praise women over 40 for a multitude of reasons. Unfortunately, it’s not reciprocal. For every stunning, smart, well-coiffed, hot woman over 40, there is a bald, paunchy relic in yellow pants making a fool of himself with some 22-year old waitress. Ladies, I apologize.
It’s true we don’t care what you’re thinking, and if we want to know what you’re thinking, we’ll tell you.
And if we do want to watch the game, you damn well know that you will be refilling glasses and getting chips.
Most women over 40 have cultivated deep friendships, meaning that if she does hit you upside the head with a cast-iron pan she can call on a friend at 4am to help dispose of the body.
We do know how to give praise which is deserving, at times. But we also know that praise is needed to get you to step/keep up with us.
Most women are born psychic, but don’t know it until they are moving towards 40 and by then the noise of the world is finally out of their heads.
A woman over 40 knows that red lipstick is made to make men think of something else that is red, well on the inside, although most men will not admit it. And younger women don’t know that. As for drag queens, well I’ve seen some wonderful red lips on them.
By the time we reach 40 with or without wrinkles hopefully we’ve become more comfortable in our own skin, so when 40 hits watch out world.
And you usually are acting like one. You may get one pass for acting like a jerk but watch your ass.
Because a woman over 40 has already told you all you needed to know when you first met her so there’s no room for bait and switch.
And for every 30 year old man-boy, with three roommates bemoaning they can’t find a woman and refuse one over 40, because they are old and must be fat. There are I’m sure plenty of 20 year olds just throwing themselves at them.
And for every woman over 40 who thinks most of what was written above is funny, it is. And it’s sad since the men over forty want 20 year olds and guys under forty want 20 year old.
Thank God we woman over 40 learned that it pays to buy a vibrator that plugs into the wall, since it get costly buying batteries which saves us money for other things. And finally, yes this woman over 40 can laugh at herself.
