Kinky Sex Link

From PamperedPenny.com.

There are so few ABDL blogs out there and the few that are even started seem to disappear after a while. In fact, I only see one–besides mine–which has been going for any length of time and that’s IHeartDiapers.com. I’m always looking for age play blogs to read, but they never seem to last, so I thought I’d actually say something.

Age players and diaper fetishists, the internet needs you!

Here’s your chance to change the world for the better and expose more people to the fun and exciting world of ABDL.

Why is an online blog the best answer?

1. It is accessible to many people. To give your blog maximum exposure, don’t host it on a private site like Diaper Space. Put it up on LiveJournal.com, Blogger.com, WordPress.com, or another mainstream blog site.

2. Express yourself fully to avoid misconceptions. Often when people come across the world of ABDL by accident, they only see snippets of what is going on and form inaccurate, unflattering opinions. A blog is a place where you can go into detail. More information is always better!

3.  Meet new friends. By talking about youself as well as just diapers, you’ll meet friends who know you better and can connect with you on multiple levels. No more separate slots for friends who are into diapers and friends who are into soccer or anime or whateer. Also, it helps turn you into a real person for those who think ABDLs are all gross weirdos. Need another reason? There are so many ABDL guys out there looking for that special someone who is open to the diaper thing, but then they only offer very limited information. A blog will get potential dates interested in you for reasons other than diapers.

I’d really like to see people creating little blogging communities out in the open. Yes, there are MySpace clones where people sporadically post poorly written, detached blogs about single diapered adventures, but I’d really like to see more ABDL blog personalities out there, and not just the young girls who seem to get overwhelmed by all the attention and quit, but all kinds of people. Wouldn’t it be great?

Would you tackle a rape fantasy in one of your stories? How about an adult male having forced sex with a teenaged girl? Those are two story lines I’ve run across over the past month, which made me think about exactly where erotica and erotic romance writing is going. I personally am not turned on by the extremes in the genres that I enjoy so much. Also, since I used to work in family law and child welfare as an activist and political writer, nothing nauseates me more than child rape, paedophilia, and incest. So any story that smacks of paedophilia will get a quick Red Light from me. Those kinds of stories appeal too much to the sickos out there who refer to people who try to help abused children as “child savers” who don’t “understand” the difference between love and abuse. Makes me want to puke.

I have been given a reviewer’s copy of the book “Wetlands”, which has been a sensation in Europe, and is now released in the U. S. Whilst it is hailed as a sensation by some reviewers, others have called is poorly disguised porn. It’s a very frank discussion of a young woman who is initially hospitalized after a pubic shaving accident, and it’s supposed to be a quite sexually graphic depiction of her life. No problem there. That’s why I requested it. Once I read it, I’ll add my own thoughts. I like reading very sexually graphic books because they’re entertaining and I often learn something very revealing about myself and about society in general from them. How we react to graphic sex tells us a lot about ourselves. This kind of graphic sex seems to me to be different from the taboo sex I talked about at the beginning of this post, though, but the reactions are very educational.

I publisher I won’t named recently has been criticized for publishing these kinds of taboo stories. One web site that published such a story without knowing what it was getting itself into had removed the post, and the author complained about censorship. At least the author was given the right to voice an opinion about the matter. Lots of authors aren’t given that much. Another incident involved the aforementioned publisher that had been the subject of complaints because of the taboo subject matter behind some of the stories it had published. Why this publisher was under the gun made me wonder, since other publishers and books with similar subject matter had not received complaints, so I don’t know what the big deal was.

The main point here is how much is too much? I remember a writer saying that a few years ago you wouldn’t have read an anal sex scene in a story. I’m not sure how accurate that was, but I understood the point. These days, anal sex scenes are commonplace. Menage wasn’t also as popular years ago as it is now. It’s actually growing into a rather hot genre. I really don’t see a problem with any sex act as long as it is between consenting adults. As I said, the only ones I have problems with are child rape, incest, and paedophilia. I really don’t have a problem with forced rape fantasies because I understand the difference between actual rape and the rape fantasy.

I’m working on a novella called “Dangerous Curves” that is a sexually candid journey of a young woman’s sexual exploits during the Big Hair 1980s in the U. S. She is a sexually free spirit who does not want to be tied down, and the men around her aren’t used to seeing a woman like that. While they enjoy her body, they want to keep her for themselves, and at the same time they expect to be allowed to play the field. The book explores the double standards about men’s and women’s sexual explorations, thoughts about virginity, playing the field, infidelity, power plays in sexuality, older men/younger women, cougars, and sexual independence. I hope to have the book finished by the end of spring, and by then I will submit it to publishers. This book is very sexually graphic, and it is not a romance. Is sex for sex’s sake too much, especially if the character enjoying sexuality without romance is a woman?

How far have you gone in your stories? What have you read that you thought was over the line? Have you ever received complaints that any of your stories have crossed the line? Are some sexually graphic stories really meant to shock rather than to make the audience think? What do you think?

x-posted from Mystress Lady Evyl

I am a huge fan of the movie Capote. It is a superb film. It shows us the time Truman Capote, a journalist, spent in Kansas learning about the mass murder of a family back in 1959. From it he wrote the book In Cold Blood. This book is considered the originator of the non-fiction novel. So after seeing this movie again recently I decided to get the book. I am presently reading it (read it, its fabulous).

Now why am I writing about it here? Well a part I read today really struck a cord in reference to my previous blog about disappointing sub applicants. This part of the book is a letter Perry’s (one of the murderers) sister wrote to him while he was in jail for other charges a year prior to the slaying of the Clutter family. Here are the exerts that hit me:

“What you have done, whether right or wrong, is your own doing. From what I personally know, you have lived your life exactly as you pleased without regard to circumstances or persons who loved you—who might be hurt.

…you don’t show me any signs of SINCERE regret and seem to show no respect for any laws, people or anything. Your letter implies that the blame of all your problems is that of someone else, but never you.
You are a human being with a free will. Which puts you above the animal level. But if you live your life without feeling and compassion for your fellow-man—you are as an animal—….”

Wow, I LOVE that last part. I can imagine what is going through your head, you the reader. What is she talking about? What kind of a Domme is she? Don’t judge, you don’t know the whole situation. And it is something I am working on nipping it in the bub.

I am however willing to bet 90% of the Dom/mes that read this can think of at least one sub that fits that bill, or it resonates a familiar feeling. Bare with me, I am ending my mental-work-through of this part of my life. I am always depressing in November lol.

Mystress Lady Evyl

P.S. Let me note here in no way am I saying bad subs have any murdering tendencies.

I had an interesting yet frustrating conversation with someone who questioned why I call myself submissive and not a slave.

For those of you that don’t know, there always seems to be a big argument in the BDSM community over who should call themselves submissive and who should call themselves a slave. Frankly I stopped giving a shit what people call themselves long ago.

The conversation went something like this:

Dominant guy: God… you should use the slave title. You are obviously looking for a service oriented position to where the Dominant in return gives you structure and stability. The only worry that you SHOULD have is serving your Master.

Me: Most Dommes seem to want a submissive in the bedroom but a vanilla guy outside of it.

Dominant guy: Stay away from the submissive title. It scares Masters like me away. Haha

Thankfully I’m not interested in a dominant guy so it really doesn’t matter if it scares away masters (lowercase on purpose) like him. It’s funny how that works though, dominant guys seem to be more interested in D/s than dominant women. I’ve been to a number of D/s oriented events, the last one I went to had maybe 50 gay couples, 50 Dominant male/submissive female couples, a few lesbian couples and two dominant women/male submissive couples.

Many dominant women have expressed to me their desires for a “submissive sometimes in the bedroom but my equal outside of it”. That’s the reason I shy away from calling myself a slave. It scares women off. Not only that, since I’ve pretty much given up on finding anything other than casual play, more and more women seem comfortable with someone who just submits to them in the bedroom. I’m all for that. Sure there’s a part of me that craves D/s, but the part of me that is dying to try out new things in the realm of BDSM overrides the part of me that needs D/s.

I’d rather be a submissive with a chance of getting fucked and toyed with than a slave who’s got no chance in hell.

I’m even cautious about mentioning my interests in D/s when someone asks me what I’m into since that’s enough to scare some off. I should maybe only qualify it by saying “look, someday, if I met someone who wanted to own me outside the bedroom, then great, Right now I’m only looking for casual play”.

Here’s another example from someone after she discovered D/s was something I enjoy:

“Yikes, are you someone that lives the lifestyle 24/7? Im not really down with that. I love sex with down right perversion, but Im not looking to own anyone…thats too heavy for me.”

It took me a while to convince her that I was perfectly happy just having sex with perversion but my interests in D/s may have cost me a one night stand with someone who enjoys things I’m dying to try.

So maybe I am a slave if that’s someone who enjoys D/s outside the bedroom. If that scares you away then I’m submissive. If that scares you away then I’m just kinky. If that scares you away then I’m just jerking off at home.

So I was editing video today and I got to thinking…

Knives (or, more precisely, knife play with Taylor) scare the shit out of me.

Not just sometimes.

Every.

Fucking.

Time.

He can take a scalpel to me. Cut lovely designs in me. It relaxes me to a wonderful, lethargic state.

But bring out a knife?  My eyes go wide, my teeth are usually chattering in moments, my throat works convuslively, my breathing hitches and stutters.

With scalpels…  he’s actually cutting me! Then again, I also know he’s cutting in a controlled way in a “safe” place.

With knives?  He sometimes cuts and sometimes doesn’t.  That alone keeps me on edge.  But it’s more than that.

It’s the tip sitting right along side my fucking eyeball or in a nostril.  The slide of it along my nipple when he’s looking at my face.  The pressure of it against my throat.  Feeling the cuts but not knowing how deep they are.  Knowing, with every breath, that he could fuck up.  That I could move wrong and he could plunge that knife into my eye or my carotid or thru my nose.  That he could take off a nipple.  That an intented shallow cut could turn out to be something much worse.

Lack of trust?

You betcha.

Completely trusting anyone with a knife is foolhardy, in my opinion.

We’ve never had an “accident”.  He’s never actually cut my throat or poked my eye.  But I know, each second that the knife is sitting there, that he could.  He might.

And worse?  Part of him would like to.

When he’s holding a knife I always get the feeling that the extreme sadist in him is on it’s very shortest, tightest leash and the dark desire to fucking HURT me is simmering so close to the surface that the wisps of steam are almost tangible.

It makes me wonder…

Those who say knife play doesn’t scare them…

What the hell are they doing?  How can it be so damned different than what I/we do?  Why is it such a trigger for my fear?

How can someone have an actual knife blade up their coochie and NOT faint?

I’d faint.

Anyhow…

New clip up. Obviously it’s a knife clip.

And the obligatory pictures.

I don’t know what’s in the air this week or in the water but as dead as it has been lately in the ‘finding’ a sub front this week I was flooded by requests. This used to be an exciting prospect but know I now not to count chicks until the eggs are well hatched. A couple of these prospects have indeed stirred a curiosity in me.

Now 2 questions I always ask are:

• have you served a Mistress in the past
• why did it end

Invariably 60% of the time they say the Domme got to emotional involved once it reached a sexual level. Well what the hell do subs think! Mistresses are immune to emotions? Of course we get emotionally attached. The relationship btw a sub and Dom/me is already a fast paced intense union based on trust. Many subs will share fears, joys, emotions they may not in a vanilla situation. Couple that with sexual relations and it feels like a relationship. Then with time the Domme gets dumped because she now likes the sub. I swear this pisses me off each time. To me this represents a character ego trait that should not be present in a true sub. And this is exactly why I do not jump into bed with subs any time soon.

Think before you act. The sub is  just as responsible as the Dom/me for the consequences of taking things on a sexual level. Emotions will arise and chances are someone will get hurt. You cannot leave a Dom/me guilt free by claiming it was not in the discussed interests. That is just a sign of week character.

My beef of the week, my 2 cents

Mystress Lady Evyl

cross-posted from The Enigmatic Angel

The Good, The Bad – and The Cheesy

Do you remember what was the first kinky film you ever watched out on the big screen?

Recently, I tripped down memory lane when a series of clicks led me to remember my first kinky cinema outing – Preaching To the Perverted.

Read More

A lot of people know me and my long hair, I’ve been growing it for a couple of years now. Unfortunately, since my surgeries I’m finding it harder and harder to take care of.

Enter people who care about me and argue about my choices in hair style (and lifestyle but that’s not what this one is about) and a serious discussion ensues about me cutting my long “Jesus” style hair.

I thought about it… This is what I came up with….

Locks of Love is a well-established nonprofit organization dedicated to gathering donated hair for children’s wigs. This group provides hairpieces to financially disadvantaged children across the U.S. who suffer from long-term medical hair loss. These children receive custom-made and fitted wigs made from donated human hair for free or on a sliding scale based on need.

Donated hair must be at least 10 inches long, clean, dry, and bundled into a ponytail or braid. Colored or permed hair is acceptable if it’s not chemically damaged. Gray hair is not suitable for children’s wigs. Most of the wig requests come from girls, and they want long hair. That’s why there is a minimum length. Hair as long as 14 to 16 inches is ideal. Shorthaired boy’s wigs are made from shorter lengths separated from longer ponytails/braids. The Fantastic Sam’s in my area also donates the cost of the cut, so guys, it’s a free haircut.

Wigs for Kids is another nonprofit group that accepts donated hair. This organization also gives hairpieces to children affected by medical hair loss. Their hair donation guidelines are slightly different — hair must be 12 inches long and must not be permed or color-treated in any way.

While chemotherapy is the best-known reason for children’s hair loss, it does not cause a permanent loss of hair. After the treatment is over, hair almost always grows back within three to six months. In contrast, alopecia areata, an autoimmune skin disease, can cause patchy or complete hair loss that lasts for years. The cause of the disease is unknown, and it currently has no cure. Locks of Love notes that most of the children they help have alopecia areata, and the wigs are a great boost to the children’s self esteem.

Another way to help cancer patients (children and adults alike) is to make soft hats to cover their heads during chemotherapy. Viking Sewing Machines has sponsored events for home sewers to make and donate “comfort caps” for those undergoing cancer treatment. One mother who lost her daughter to cancer created a web site with free knitting patterns you can use to make soft berets and hats for cancer patients. Sewing.org has a free tutorial on making turbans to wear during chemotherapy. All of these projects require very few materials and are simple enough for beginners to try.

Whether you have hair or handicrafts to donate, those in need will appreciate the warm, stylish head coverings and your generosity. I’ll post the naked head photos on Thursday.

Why does the sugar always disappear when you pour milk on Frosted Mini-Wheats? You have to eat it really fast so it still tastes good, but even then you always get some that have no sugar left on them. Plus if you don’t eat them fast enough, they got all soggy. Where does the sugar go?

Cross-posted from my blog.

Here is what I think I Daddy dominant is/can be. A Daddy may be some or all of these things. Please note this is my personal opinion. I am not attempting to say that a Daddy dominant must be any of these things, or that my description is what all Daddy dominants are.

A Daddy is usually a compassionate dominant. A Daddy dominant is also usually less on the sadistic side. A Daddy can foster the inner child in his little girl. Often times, being a Daddy dominant and having an adult babygirl or little girl is very much about age play. I typically like it that way. A Daddy dominant may let his little girl act out her bratty side within reason, though she usually pays for it. A Daddy dominant often practices tough love. His punishments don’t always cause pain. Often, it involves a loss of privilege or a time-out/corner time. A Daddy dominant can usually handle his little girl when she’s being pouty or bratty or throwing a temper tantrum, which she may occasionally do. I, as a little girl, enjoy the opportunity to be bratty on occasion, even when I do pay for it. A Daddy dominant is fun to snuggle with, like a big teddy bear. A Daddy dominant often enjoys his little girl being happy, and showing her happiness. Sometimes, Daddy dominants spoil their little girls… sometimes rotten. Us little girls are just too cute to resist spoiling sometimes. Though, somehow, Daddy dominants are usually really good at finding a balance between spoiling and discipline.

And, unfortunately, it’s getting late and my brain is slowly shutting down. So those are all the thoughts I have right now.